Thunder's On The Way And It's Raining In My Heart

"I hate them and I hope they run out of milk and don't realize it and have to go to the store."

I typed this line yesterday in an e-conversation with Tiny Dancer, aka Pinhead, aka Stacey (we actually work together, so e-conversations might seem kind of silly, but, well ... I don't know what to say to that).

Why would I say such a thing? To whom was I refering?

Well, to all my out-of-town Monkey Maniacs, you should know that this Saturday we here in Kentuckiana kick off the Kentucky Derby season with the annual "Thunder Over Louisville," which is supposedly the largest fireworks show in the U.S. It's quite a spectacle.

One problem: those of us who actually live just north of the Ohio River (in Jeffersonville, Indiana) but work in Louisville have a terrible time getting across the river because of Thunder. Why, you ask? Because they choose to shoot off the fireworks on one of the only TWO downtown bridges Louisville has. That's right, because some local joyboys want to fire bottle rockets off the 2nd Street Bridge, yours truly has to leave for work an hour early and resign himself to getting home late today and Friday. It takes them THREE DAYS to set the fireworks up on the bridge.

Now, to be fair, there are a lot of fireworks. It is something to see. If any of you distant people see the light and move to Louisville, you will be totally impressed with this event for at least five or six years, unless you live in Jeffersonville, where it's cheaper, in which case you will be clawing your own face off in frustration by your second or third year.

I don't really hate them, though -- the joyboys. But I DO hope they run out of milk and don't realize it and have to make a late night trip to the store. And I hope that by the time they realize it, they're in their pajamas, so they have to change clothes before hopping in their car and heading to market. THAT will teach them a lesson.