Jive Monkey Gold: Enough Food?

I suck. It's "I" instead of "we" because I don't want to speak for you. But follow my story and see if you fit the bill.
I feel so inadequate. What am I doing? Late at night I look at the problems I face, compare them to the resources I have, and sigh. I'm supposed to fulfill the Great Commission? I can't even help myself!
Do you ever end up short on cash, while bills remain to be paid, charities remain to be helped, groceries, clothes, or textbooks remain to be bought?
Is the work piled on your desk, the dirty clothes piled in your laundry bin, and your "free time" pledged away for weeks in advance? Friends going through every catastrophe from bad dating experiences to the deaths of loved ones? Family members feeling neglected? Coworkers fighting depression? Fellow students losing focus? Do they all wish someone could fix it?
Can you fix it?
Okay, now I'll say it. You suck, too. And the thing is, you can't even encourage yourself out of the duldrums, let alone give spiritual manna to the hungry on your doorstep, your voicemail, or your Yahoo! Then you go to church and you hear about all the needs, all the opportunities to serve, all the ministerial positions that may go vacant if you don't give ... what? Your time? You have none. Your cash? What cash? Your skills? You're a regular Napoleon Dynamite.
Can we find a solution? And can it be found in something so modest as a story?
And as long as we're going there, we might as well choose an unbelievable one. One with a point that's easy to miss. Because what do you do when you can't see a way out? You throw caution to the wind:

Mark 6:34-44 34When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things.
35By this time it was late in the day, so his disciples came to him. “This is a remote place,” they said, “and it's already very late. 36Send the people away so they can go to the surrounding countryside and villages and buy themselves something to eat.”
37But he answered, “You give them something to eat.”
They said to him, “That would take eight months of a man's wages! Are we to go and spend that much on bread and give it to them to eat?”
38“How many loaves do you have?” he asked. “Go and see.”
When they found out, they said, “Five–and two fish.”
39Then Jesus directed them to have all the people sit down in groups on the green grass. 40So they sat down in groups of hundreds and fifties. 41Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to his disciples to set before the people. He also divided the two fish among them all. 42They all ate and were satisfied, 43and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces of bread and fish. 44The number of the men who had eaten was five thousand.

We call it the story of the loaves and fishes. But Mark wants us to see the people, not the food.
The disciples know the score. They're in the hills and gulleys. "This is a lonely place and the hour is late. Let the hungry people fend for themselves in the villages." Reasonable.
Jesus has another idea. "You give them something to eat."
They're incredulous. "Sure Jesus. That'll take, what? Eight months wages? Do we look like we're made of money?"
I am so there. A needy world in front of me, and feelings of inadequacy within. So I whine to Jesus too. "Should I snap my fingers and voila! everyone's problems away, Jesus?" "Want me to cut myself into eight different pieces so there's enough of me to go around, Jesus?"
Christ doesn't send them out for supplies. He says, "Go see how many loaves you have." Ridiculous. What difference does it make? It won't be enough. And when the disciples come back, things seem even worse: "We have five loaves and two fish."
Okay, time for Jesus to take a reality check. And time for us (we who suck) to identify with the disciples. Here we sit, with our Wonderbread and our Gordon's fishsticks, facing a starving generation.
Jesus ignores the reality check because He is the reality. He tells the crowd to sit. He blesses the paltry lunch and divides the sandwiches like a good Jewish father. 10,000 eyes watch as His confused disciples begin to distribute.
We miss the point. "How did He do it?" we ask. We have no problem believing God created the entire universe, but we don't want to credit Him with the power to stretch a meal. Stretch it He does, and after everyone has loosened their belts and patted their bellies, there are twelve baskets of leftovers.
Mark's theme! The people are fed when Jesus blesses their meager resources. Paul understood. "I will all the more gladly boast of my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may rest upon me ... for when I am weak, then I am strong."
When we put our little loaves and fishes to work ... it works. The underfunded, understaffed mission keeps chugging. Your hurting friend finds your words to be apples of gold, though you felt helpless when delivering them. You join the chain of generations, countless Christians stretching back to that original happy meal, those original weak, inadequate disciples who fed the crowd with Christ's blessing.
The world is hungry again, and it's our turn.
Our kids, or those young enough to be, are hungry. Our parents, or those old enough to be, are hungry. Our friends, or those who should be, are hungry. Our brothers and sisters in Christ, or those who could be, are hungry.
Jesus knows, better than we do, that our resources are threadbare. But He has blessed them. He has blessed them!
The world is hungry again. And it's our turn.
Let's give them something to eat.

I Know You're Lurking

I know at least one or two members of my community group occasionally lurk in the background of this blog. You lurkers can now put a mystery to rest:

I gave an analogy this past week in group that floored everyone. I was immediately asked if I thought of it myself. I said, "No, I'm pretty sure I read it somewhere."

I did.

And imagine my surprise when I discovered yesterday that it was, again, Tozer, whom I had quoted last week on this blog. So groupies, now you know the source of the quote. And for the rest of you, pay attention because this is good:

"Someone may fear that we are magnifying private religion out of all proportion, that the "us" of the New Testament is being displaced by a selfish "I." Has it ever occured to you that one hundred pianos all tuned to the same fork are automatically tuned to each other? They are of one accord being tuned, not to each other, but to another standard to which each must individually bow. So one hundred worshippers meeting together, each one looking away to Christ, are in heart nearer to each other than they could possibly be were they to become "unity" conscious and turn their eyes away from God to strive for closer fellowship."

You Are a Soy Latte

At your best, you are: free spirited, down to earth, and relaxed At your worst, you are: dogmatic and picky You drink coffee when: you need a pick me up, and green tea isn't cutting it Your caffeine addiction level: medium

What Kind of Coffee Are You?

Books On An Island

Last night in community group we all went around in a circle, naming any 5 of our 100 books (not counting the Bible, which is a given) that we'd take with us to a deserted island (naming the "Top 5" is too hard). I began rattling off titles and was silenced shortly after five. Here is the list that was on my mind (this is by no means exhaustive. Indeed, I'm sure there are books that I like better than some of these that are, nevertheless, not on the top of my mind right now).

Complete Poems -- Robert Frost
The Great Gatsby -- F. Scott Fitgerald
Systematic Theology -- Wayne Gruden
The Pursuit Of God -- A.W. Tozer
Unceasing Worship -- Harold Best
Scribbling In The Sand -- Michael Card
Babbit -- Sinclair Lewis
Baptist Hymnal
Complete Stories -- Flannery O'Connor
Gilead -- Marilynn Robinson

What would be some of your selections? You need not limit it to any certain number -- it could be one, three, twenty ....

Tozer

Leaving behind the injustice of the Benito Juarez situation, here is something from A.W. Tozer's "The Pursuit Of God":

Think for yourself whether much of your sorrow has not arisen from someone speaking slightly of you. As long as you set yourself up as a little god to which you must be loyal there will be those who will delight to offer affront to your idol....

Jesus calls us to His rest, and meekness is His method. The meek man cares not at all who is greater than he, for he has long ago decided that the esteem of the world is not worth the effort. He develops toward himself a kindly sense of humor and learns to say, "Oh, so you have been overlooked? They have placed someone else before you? They have whispered that you are pretty small stuff after all? And now you feel hurt because the world is saying about you the very things you have been saying about yourself? Only yesterday you were telling God that you were nothing, a mere worm of the dust. Where is your consistency? Come on, humble yourself, and cease to care what men think" ....

The meek man is not a human mouse afflicted with a sense of his own inferiority. Rather, he may be in his moral life as bold as a lion and as strong as Sampson; but he has stopped being fooled about himself. He has accepted God's estimate of his own life. He knows he is weak and helpless as God has declared him to be, but paradoxically, he knows at the same time that he is, in the sight of God, more important than angels. In himself, nothing; in God, everything ... He knows well that this world will never see him as God sees him and he has stopped caring.

This is a passage that I revisit from time to time, and pray that God will help me measure up to it.

Day of Infamy -- The Benito Juarez Incident

I write this late Tuesday afternoon. It is Benito Juarez' birthday, a holiday in Mexico.

Who was Benito Juarez? Well, it was precisely this question that I answered with stunning accuracy and candor one year ago, on the blog belonging to one "Random" Cheryl Rupp (blogbycheryl.blogspot.com). Cheryl was holding a competition for a latte, offering this prize to the blogger who gave her the best answer.

I gave the best answer.

I did not win.

My nemesis, Lorie King, won. As per usual.

"Benito Juarez" has become my "Remember the Alamo!" And it ever shall be.

I think it should be yours, too. All across America, all you Monkey Maniacs -- every time you are slighted, wronged, or perpetrated against, you should shout from the hilltops, "Benito Juarez," while pumping your arm in the air and shaking your fist.

Best Things Of The Day

Quote of the Day:

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. If you still don't succeed, just give up. There's no sense in making a fool of yourself over it."

-- W.C. Fields

Song Lyric of the Day:

Well put all your love where it hurts the most
And expect a little visit from the Holy Ghost.
When your short wave dies and there's no one to listen,
Stars growing cold in your solar system.

And I really love to see you like this --
The moonlight dripping off your finger tips.

-- Vigilantes of Love

Monkey Maniac of the Day:

Jay Eubanks is the Monkey Maniac of the Day. Jay just moved across town Saturday, and he gave me a stack of great CDs and one concert DVD. Wahoo! I was one of many who helped him move -- heavy stuff but at least no piano or fridge. It was fun.

Jay and his wife Lindsay have a passion for inner city ministry, and they embody what it means to love your neighbor. Jay is a deacon at Sojourn and is the point person for the Jefferson Street Baptist Center, a men's shelter that reaches out to the most desparate of homeless men -- alcoholics and those with mental health problems.

He's also a great singer-songwriter and concert promoter.

I know that Jay will use this award to ascend to new heights of accomplishment. And for that I am glad to present him with the Monkey Maniac of the Day Award.

And that's all the Day Awards for now. Go forth in love and peace.

Did You Know?

Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there.

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush. I keep my toothbrush in the living room now.

No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.

The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did the first 'Marlboro Man'.

All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.

Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

Pearls melt in vinegar.

Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.

The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.

A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.

The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.

Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all
the letters from the word "criminal." The second? William Jefferson Clinton.

And, the best for last.....
Turtles can breathe through their butts.

Now, my Monkey Maniacs, you know everything. Go in peace, and stay forever jive to the monkey!

Racial Reconciliation

From "Restoring At-Risk Communities," edited by John Perkins, founder and chairman of Christian Community Development Association:

"It is clear that the message of reconciliation between Jew and Gentile was a central part of the gospel Paul preached. A gospel that could not reconcile humans across the most difficult barrier of the day was no gospel at all. So it is with us. If the gospel is not concerned with reconciling us across the most stubborn ethnic and racial, indeed all man-made, barriers, then it is no gospel at all. Reconciliation is not optional, it is not a specialized calling for a few, it is not a trivial concern, it is central to the heart of the gospel."

How basic this is. And yet what a hard lesson to learn, one that we forget again and again. We cannot be reconciled to God yet remain unreconciled to our brothers and sisters.

Deep Observations

My wonderful cousin Debby sent me these. Enjoy:

DEEP OBSERVATIONS ON LIFE



1) When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in

his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car."

--Author Unknown



2) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a

headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle:

"Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children."

--Author Unknown



3) "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support

group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar."

--Drew Carey



4) "The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable

job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the

end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house."

--Jeff Foxworthy



5) "If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an

infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even

considering if there is a man on base."

--Dave Barry



6) "Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should

treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you,

they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay,

the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp."

--Bob Ettinger



7) "My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the

lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to

teach you how to swim.'"

--Paula Poundstone



8) "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal

skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh."

--Conan O'Brien



9) "Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through

my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a slow

learner."

--Lynda Montgomery



10) "I think that's how Chicago and Detriot got started. Bunch of people

in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it

just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'"

--Richard Jeni



11) "If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the

impersonators would be dead."

--Johnny Carson



12) "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us

geography."

--Paul Rodriguez



13) "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty

and that's the law."

--Jerry Seinfeld



14) "Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire

you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to

tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?"

--Warren Hutcherson



15) "Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same."

--Oscar Wilde



16) "Suppose you were an idiot ... And suppose you were a member of

Congress..... But I repeat myself."

--Mark Twain





17) "Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At

least they can find Afghanistan."

--A. Whitney Brown



18) "You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog

will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've

thought of that!'"

--Dave Barry

Jive Monkey Gold: Salvation!

This is a very special edition of Jive Monkey Gold. We here at Jive To The Monkey have been in intensive negotiations, and can now announce to you that we have successfully managed to win second-publishing rights to the story of Earl P Rabbit's salvation story from last year. This story first appeared on Earl's (otherwise known as Rabby's) blog (earlprabbit.blogspot.com) last September. Many of you will remember the dark creature that Rabby was before giving his life to the Lord, and how he would often show up in various blogs, ranting, challenging people to engage in fisticuffs, and otherwise causing a ruckus. This, then, is a powerful story of the Lord's grace. Enjoy:

"Guess what? I gone an got saved" by Earl P. Rabbit, otherwise known as Rabby

Well an I got saved last night at the ol' camp meetin' of the First United Holy Ghost-Filled Sactified Baptist Church All Day-Singin' and Dinner on the Ground. An I guess I'll tell ya about it.
Well I always liked me some good ol' gospel music. Not like this here stuff where's all it amounts to is some watered-down, Jesus-is-my-boyfriend, American Idol Karaoke night an electric pianer music an you don't even know if anyone who came on by would know'd it was a song about the Lord or not, but I mean some real ol' gospel sangin'. An so I was a talkin' about it on ol' Nikki Tatom's blog, an it got me to thinkin' about how it'd been forever since I been to a meetin', on account a the last time I went somebody stepped on my blue suede shoes an I had to show em my paws, up close and on the kisser, an the deacons all threw me out. But that was the ol' Rabby, not the new one.
An I'm all new cuz at this service last night, after we sung some a them good ol songs like Vict'ry In Jesus, Walkin' In Jerusalem Just Like John, an There Is A Fountain, that ol' preacher man got up there an started declarin' the Word a the Lord, an it was a powerful message. An he told me that Jesus Christ died for my sins an I better git right with him an except his sacrifice cuz the day's a comin' when time shall be no more an it will be too late, an me an my kind that has trampled on His holy name will be trod underfoot an sent into that lake a fire. An right then, that preacher was close to gettin' a booty whoopin' cuz I thought, "Preacher, I ain't a trampled on no holy name, I'm just a good ol' boy. An I pay my taxes an I beat up commies whenever I sees 'em an all, an if someone takes the Lord's name in vain I read 'em their rights an even if I have to, I spit tobaccer juice right on their shoes an I say, "If'n you say the Lord's name in vain again, there's more than tobaccer juice gonna befall ya."
But then that preacher kept a goin' an the Holy Spirit fell on me an showed me the fruits a my doin's. All the violence an the bitterness an all that beer an whiskey, just a makin' me do foolish things an cause trouble. An all the womens. Oh my, all those womens. An I seen that it was jest cuz I'm a tryin' to fill the emptiness inside a me but it ain't a workin'. An then that preacher read about some people that was a pricked in their hearts an they said "What must we do to be saved," an right then I jumped up an hollered "Yeah, Preacher, what must I, a vile sinner, do to be saved." An I jumped so high and hollered so loud, the lady right next to me fainted away, but that preacher, he pointed at me and he shouted "Repent in that name above all name, be baptized in the water and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit!"
An I said, "That does it for me, preacher, take me to that watery grave!"
An ever one was a shoutin' and a sayin' "Another prodigal has returned to the fold!" An then they started singin' that good ol song "Warshed In The Blood," an it was like I was a hearin' those words fer the first time, an I shouted an ran all the way to that river bank and sloshed right through that water. I didn't even care that my fur was a gettin' all wet, I said "Dunk me Jesus!"
An that preacher, he come in after me an he said, "Boy, I baptize you in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit," an then he laid me under an I CAME UP A SHOUTIN' AN A SINGIN' HIS PRAISES, an a good ol' fashion Holy Ghost revival broke out on that there river bank an we had twenty-seven souls added to the army of the Lord. An we was a carryin' on all night long. An it was like the sky split open an the Lord descended on my wee head an said "Child, your roamin' days are over, enter into my fold." And let me tell ya what, the tears a joy was a flowin' from these eyes a mine, an I don't care if the world knows it. Cuz I been bought by the blood a Jesus an I'm a gonna tell it ever where I go.
An I ain't a gonna be layin' the smackdown on folks no more, not even them that deserves it. An I put away the bottle cuz Lord knows how it makes me git sideways. An I'm a takin' up my banjer an a gonna sing his praises ever chance I git.
An now all a ya'll that gits my goat, I'm a sorry for my bitterness. Nikki Tatom, I'm a sorry fer thinkin' yer a creepy little kid an bein' bitter cuz you don't link to my blog from yer's. You an me is pals now. An Will Wyman, I'm a sorry that right here in this blog I called you Loser a the Day, cuz yer a winner with Jesus and that says it fer me. An ol' Tom Branch, you is always tryin' to pull my chain but I forgive ya, ol' pal. An I forgive Lorie King fer her part in kidnappin' me even though she won't fess up to it. An you still smell nice Miss King but now I even think yer personality is all right.
An even them Anderson's -- well, Amanda Anderson anyway. No, that's not right, I got to do what the Lord commands -- Joel Anderson, put 'er there, pal. Me and you's gonna bury the hatchet an work for the Kingdom. An last but not least, Gilles, I'm a sorry fer all the mean things I said an fer startin' this blog jest to bedevil you. Now this blog will be used fer the forces of good, an you an me can be friends.
And now that's all but I'll be back later. I got to git out a here. An I love you all, an go an tell someone what the Lord has done fer ya, an then fer good measure say "An he saved ol' Rabby's wicked soul." An that's a "amen." It shore is.

Childrens' Ministries

The following is a reprint of the article I wrote for the latest Travelogue, Sojourn Community Church's bi-monthly journal. I thought it would be interesting for Sojourners who missed it, but also for people of other communities, simply as food for thought. There are many different models for conducting kids' ministries. Here is one:

It is no overstatement to say that the future of Sojourn is the children of Sojourn. The children’s ministry started five years ago with a few kids, and now serves fifty to sixty kids each week at Sojourn Gathered.

“Given that we are a young congregation, even if we didn’t have a lot of new families getting involved, we’d see a ton of new kids coming into the church within the next few years,” Teaching Pastor-Elder Daniel Montgomery said in a recent interview. “We’re a ‘baby factory’ right now. And since so many new people have been coming to Sojourn as well, we knew we needed to make more room for kids, which is one of the main reasons we purchased the new building.”

Sojourn’s philosophy of children’s ministry represents a paradigm shift from the contemporary church model -- exchanging what can be called a church-based ministry for a family-based ministry. Ben Freudenburh and Rick Lawrence, authors of “The Family Friendly Church,” state “Parents are the primary Christian educators in the church, and the family is the God-ordained institution for building faith in young people and for passing faith on from one generation to the next.” In practice, this means a shift in church philosophy from conducting ministry to managing ministry -- partnering with parents, training and equipping them as they raise their children to know Christ.

Sojourn’s family vision statement says, “We must recognize that the church is not a business, but a family. It is a household of households. We are called to build up our families, not our church structures or programs.”

This distinction is critical, according to Montgomery, who said “There is a myth that says ‘all kids need is a nuclear family.’ But down through the centuries the Church has always understood that it takes a community, an extended family of believers all operating as a larger family, praying for each other, watching each other’s kids, supporting them and helping them grow and learn to live out the Gospel in every day life.”

“Children are not a problem,” Montgomery continued, “they’re an opportunity. No one is more formable than a child. This is why we have to teach them from the start -- to integrate them into the family of God and instill in them the same values that we instill in each other. Sojourn is about Gospel-transformation, and that begins with our kids embracing the Gospel, not assuming they understand it. It begins with loving Louisville, teaching the kids to love their neighborhood, friends and local institutions. It begins with teaching them true humility, which has a radical impact on the way they see themselves -- that they are made in the image of God, but yet the world doesn’t revolve around them. And it begins with prayer -- kids, parents, ministers praying together.”

There is a specific plan in place for working through this philosophy, a plan that can be further implemented as quickly as Sojourn’s partners can support and do the work of this vital ministry. It includes visits by the Elders to each family with children in the congregation, and extends to conference teaching sessions, panel discussion events, and an expectant parents’ mentoring model.

It is also a flexible plan, a work-in-progress, as stated in the Sojourn family vision statement:
“It is the desire of the Elders to extract a vision more than to cast one. We recognize that there will be a need for the investment of intelligent and sacrificial effort to create what we believe to be this kind of biblical vision here at Sojourn. Our hope is to learn from Scriptures, from each other, from other communities of faith, and from other leaders in the field.”

Specific things to look forward to as Sojourn moves to its new location include an indoor playground and an art studio -- places where children can be nurtured and taught to embrace a creative environment. Many of the features of the new building will be designed with a multi-generational philosophy in mind, features like the art gallery, music venue, community outreach ministries -- things that children will be encouraged to participate in, working alongside adults rather than being segregated into a “church within a church.”

“How you get them is how you’ll keep them,” Montgomery explains. As to whether Sojourn will have a youth group when the many young children begin entering their teenage years, he says “It depends on what you mean. We’re not going to be about ‘pie-in-the-face’ kinds of entertainment. Not that we’re against fun things, but we don’t want ministries that are driven by games, watered-down teaching, and the trappings of consumerism.”

There are two ways for everyone at Sojourn to bring the vision for a thriving children’s ministry to fruition. The first is to embrace the paradigm shift by understanding that the home is where it all begins, not the church. “Spirituality in the home is very messy,” Montgomery said. “Children need to see parents living out the Gospel, but they also need to understand that we all fall short -- to know that Mommy and Daddy are sinners but Jesus makes us clean.”

The second way is to pray that more people will catch the vision and take up the work needed in this area of church ministry, and to consider becoming involved yourself. “We are looking for leaders to pick up this vision and work it,” Montgomery said. This involves everything from mentoring, encouraging, staffing the Sunday school classes, and using the organizational skills necessary to implement the vision. “Many people at Sojourn have said ‘I wish we had more older Christians here to mentor us.’ We need to realize that we can be those older, wiser Christians for the next generation. We need to be those older, wiser Christians.”

For more information on how you can get involved in the Sojourn Children’s Ministry, contact Rob Plummer at rplummer@sbts.edu


Recommended reading: “Romancing Your Child’s Heart” by Monte Swan and David Biebel
“Sacred Parenting” Gary L. Thomas
“Shepherding Your Child’s Heart” Ted Tripp

Sickness

No new post today because I am very sick. I shouldn't have tried to come into work today, but here I sit -- an idiot.

I'm gonna finish up some stuff at work and go home to bed. Your prayers are all appreciated, my Monkey Maniacs.

Feel free to pull up a chair and browse through old posts for a bit. Or something. I'm borderline delirious.

Theological depth in worship lyrics

I talked about some of the differences in modern worship lyrics and old hymns in the comments section of the article two posts removed, and it has gotten my juices flowing.

When we talk about lyrics, I feel that the best example we have is the Bible. Of course, the obvious "hymn book" of the Bible is Psalms. There is a remarkable bit of variance in the Psalms -- songs of lament (which you almost never hear in modern Christian music -- we're supposed to pretend that we're happy and brimming with confidence all the time) songs of joy, of suffering, of doubt, of assurance, of victory. Songs that probe the nature of God and man, as well as simple love songs to God. The Psalms show that there is no one "this is how deep every song should be" rule. We will always need simple songs that express, in an easily-related fashion, our praise. But, taken as a whole, the Psalms and the other songs in the Bible show us how far off the mark we've fallen with some of the praise choruses in the modern Church.

Let's look at some of the earliest hymn fragments of the early Church, recorded in scripture:

The song of Mary (Luke 1:46-55) which in later time became known as the Magnificat, the song of Zacharias (Luke 1:68-79), later known as the Benedictus, and the song of Simeon (Luke 2:29-32), which became the Nunc Dimittis, were all theologically sound, expressive, rich outpourings. In other words, you wouldn't mistake the God celebrated in these songs for an earthly lover or your big cosmic buddy.

The apostle Paul recorded several hymn-like fragments in his epistles, which scholars believe were quoted from early Church worship services. These were doctrinal hymns, creeds set to melody -- these early Christians were doing what Paul taught them to do: speaking to each other and instructing each other through song. For instance:

He who was revealed in the flesh,
Was vindicated in the Spirit,
Seen by angels,
Proclaimed among the nations,
Believed on in the world,
Taken up in glory. (1 Tim. 3:16b, NASB)

and this fragment from a baptismal hymn, which Paul used to illuminate his teaching:

For this reason it says,
"Awake, sleeper,
And arise from the dead,
And Christ will shine on you." (Eph. 5:14, NASB)

The book of Revelation is particularly rich in song, particularly doxological (praise) hymns. Here's an example -- "The Song of Moses, The Servant of God, and the Song of the Lamb":

And they sang the song of Moses, the bond-servant of God, and the song of the Lamb, saying,
"Great and marvelous are Your works,
O Lord God, the Almighty;
Righteous and true are Your ways,
King of the nations!
Who will not fear, O Lord, and glorify Your name?
For You alone are holy;
For ALL THE NATIONS WILL COME AND WORSHIP BEFORE YOU,
FOR YOUR RIGHTEOUS ACTS HAVE BEEN REVEALED." (Rev. 15:3-4, NASB)

This is strong stuff -- there is no confusing the God worshiped in this song for an earthly lover, the deity of another religion, an impersonal life-force or a warm, fuzzy fog of enlightenment or "higher power." There is history and future in this refrain, and a God who is clearly Lord of all. This is the kind of thing that the Church continued to express for nearly two millennia.

And, again, I would say that there are still many examples in the modern Church of great worship songs, great modern hymns, that can truly be used by a singer, band, or choir to lead -- really lead -- a congregation into worship. Sadly, however, there are many songs that fail any such standard, and many churches that specialize in singing these fluffy kinds of songs in the names of inclusiveness, relevance, and seeker-sensitivity -- good goals in their proper context, to be sure, but nevertheless goals that have often run amuck in the modern Church.

These are the kind of things I keep in mind when writing my own songs. If you have any thoughts, feel free to share them.

My First Musical Hero

Long before I got into Dylan, years before I'd heard Caedmon's Call or before the members of Nickel Creek were out of high school, my musical hero was a southern/country gospel singer named Kenny Hinson. Kenny was lead vocalist and occasional songwriter/ guitarist for the Hinsons, a quartet consisting of three brothers and one sister.

The Hinsons disbanded in the late 80s but came back for a reunion tour and new album in 1993. Shortly thereafter, Kenny, only in his fourties, was stricken with the cancer that would soon kill him.

Kenny had a rich, resonant country voice with a dynamic range. I tried and tried as a kid to mimic the sound of his delivery, to keep up with his range, to make his inflections my inflections. Thank God I finally realized that you have to develop your own style rather than ape someone else's, and that, furthermore, I don't have anywhere near that type of voice anyway. But I still have fond memories growing up in my parents house, listening to "The Lighthouse" and all those Hinson songs, and of going with my parents to see the Hinsons in concert once or twice a year.

A current southern/country gospel singer named Mike Bowling has just come out with a new Kenny Hinson tribute CD -- a collection of classic Kenny songs. Mike is probably the closest thing, vocally, to Kenny Hinson in gospel music today, although Kenny has countless imitators. It's in my CD player right now. And I am wistful. Full of wist. Positively brimming with it.

Jive Monkey Gold: A Tale Of Two Poems

Here's a little something I wrote last summer. Let me remind you that my rip-off of Shakespeare does not reflect the views of me or anyone working here at Jive To The Monkey, but rather is a simple indication of the times in which we live.

I just wrote a sonnet based off of Shakespeare's famous "My Mistress' Eyes Are Nothing Like The Sun." Mine makes a statement about our postmodern society, as opposed to the Bard's world. First, I will share Shakespeare's original with you. Then, mine. I think you will agree that it captures the spirit of the times. Enjoy.

Shakespeare
My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;
Coral is far more red than her lips' red;
If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;
If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.
I have seen roses damasked, red and white,
But no such roses see I in her cheeks,
And in some perfumes is there more delight
Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.
I love to hear her speak, yet well I know
That music hath a far more pleasing sound.
I grant I never saw a goddess go;
My mistress when she walks treads on the ground.
And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare
As any she belied with false compare

B-Dog
My mistress’ eyes are not much like the sun
(Let’s not confuse the bloodshot lines for light)
They were, before the damage had been done
(the damage caused by drinking shots all night).
Her lips could use some collagen, I guess,
And Botox could do wonders for her face.
Some silicone would sure perk up her breasts,
And Clairol would disguise the telling grays.
Every time she sings, I curse or growl
Because her voice is always sharp or flat.
We can’t eat spicy foods because her bowels
Would cause the air to stink right where she sat.
And yet, by God, my love for her is strong --
And will be, till a hottie comes along.

Friendship, friendship -- such a perfect blendship ...

And we go from Brazilian fight dancing to thoughts on friendship ...

A couple years ago The Nightriders (a group of best-friend Super Heroes) traded many quotes on friendship back and forth. I found some of them not long ago. Here they are. I hope you can say that you have experienced true friendship:

A friend hears the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails.-- Anonymous

A best friend is like a four leaf clover: hard to find and lucky to have.

When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there.

Good friends are like stars....You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.

A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway. -- Fr. Jerome Cummings

Hold a true friend with both your hands. -- Nigerian Proverb

"A true friend is the greatest of all blessings, and that which we take the least care to acquire."
-- La Rochefoucauld (1665)

A true friend is someone who is there for you when he'd rather be anywhere else. -- Len Wein

It's the ones you can call up at 4:00 a.m. that really matter.-- Marlene Dietrich

One who looks for a friend without faults will have none. -- Hasidic Saying

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.-- Walter Winchell

"I keep my friends as misers do their treasure, because, of all the things granted us by wisdom, none is greater or better than friendship."
-- Pietro Aretino (1537)

"A friend loves at all times."
-- The Bible: Proverbs 17, 17.

"A companion loves some agreeable qualities which a man may possess, but a friend loves the man himself."
-- James Boswell (1763)

"True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost"
-- Charles Caleb Colton (1825)

"We do not so much need the help of our friends as the confidence of their help in need."
-- Epicurus (3rd century B.C.)

"My friend is he who will tell me my faults in private."
-- Solomon Ibn Gabirol

"Let your best be for your friend..."
-- Kahil Gibran

"In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures."
-- Kahil Gibran

"A sympathetic friend can be quite as dear as a brother."
-- Homer (9th century B.C.)

"Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends whom we choose." -- Tehyi Hsieh

An honest answer is the sign of true friendship.-- Proverbs 24:26

Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-Samuel Paterson

Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. -- Sicilian Proverb

True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity, before it is entitled to the appellation. -- George Washington

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!-- Doug Larson

Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends. -- Czech. Proverb

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
-Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968)

Uncle Bobby and Brazilian Fight Dancing

Last Saturday, the Fifth Third Bank World Rhythms series presented "Dance Brazil" at the Brown Theater. Dance Brazil is a troupe that was founded in 1975 by Jelon Viera to introduce traditional Afro-Brazilian dance and capoeira to the United States. Since then they've crossed the States, and the world, many times over.

Their program Saturday was great. Presented in two parts seperated by a short intermission, they performed several different dances, mostly of joy and celebration. A high point in the program was their presentation of capoeira, an Afro-Brazilian martial art that migrated to Brazil from Angola as a fighting style that was disguised as a dance in order for the practitioners to be able to practice it openly (it had been prohibited by the ruling authority because they didn't want the people to be able to learn how to kick booty and thus win their freedom).

Jackie Chan ain't got nothing on these people. They were flying around that stage. It's the best dance ever invented to teach people to kick each other.

Afterwards, that little boll weevil Lorie and I made our way to the front, where she began conversing with a member of the troupe in Portuguese. She thinks I can't speak the language, but I can. I heard everything that was said. It went like this:

Macho Brazilian Guy (MBG): Well hellooooo, lady.

Lorie: Hehehe. Hello, you big, strapping man!!!

MBG: I am about to do my cool-down stretches and wash up. After that, you should show me around town. And perhaps we'll get better acquainted.

Lorie: Hehehe! Perfect! Hehehehehe!

MBG: (looking my way) What about this guy? Does he have to come along?

Lorie: He drove. He's sort of like my stupid big brother.

MBG: Brother? But -- all the greys in his goatee?

Lorie: Uncle. He's like my Uncle-in-Christ.

MBG: Hahaha! He is old man. Hahaha!

Now, you may all be wondering why I was allowing this to go on -- why I didn't point out that I'm only 34 and I only have a FEW greys on the chin. Truth is, I was just hoping if I played it cool and remained amicable, he might bring along one of those cute Brazilian girls. Like maybe his sister. Or, um, his aunt. I guess.

Unfortunately for me, that didn't happen. I had to go to the bathroom, but before I went Lorie said something about me going ahead and letting her have the keys so she could put her purse away. When I came back, no car. No, um, niece-in-Christ. No nobody. I had to walk home in the wind and rain.

I got my car back a couple days ago. Lorie said something about having gotten a call that her neighbor's cat was up a tree, and she needed to borrow my vehicle right that very second so she could speed home, scale the tree, and save the cat. I can see how something like that could happen, I guess, so it's all okay.

Still though, it was a great show. If you ever get a chance to see Dance Brazil, you should take it. Tell them B-Dog sent you!

Of Friendship and Betrayal

There's a Middle Eastern parking attendant in the lot across the street from my work building. I drive to work a couple days a week, and have parked there, lo these many moons. Well, I found out a month or two ago that as long as I get to work before 9 (which I always do) it's actually 50 cents cheaper to park at Louisville Gardens, which also has the benefit of being a garage. And it's just as close, so I've been parking there.



But I miss my little Middle Eastern parking attendant. He talks like Sayid from "Lost." And he smiles and makes a little chit-chat when I pull in. "How are you doing? ... Coming in a little later this morning, I see ... I cannot get used to these Lou-eee-ville weathers, my friend..."



It's just a machine at Louisville Gardens.



I feel like Sayid and I had a connection. We were sort of like David and Jonathan -- Sayid and I. There was something there. And I have sold out my little Iraqi-Arabian-whatever parking attendant brother for 50 cents and an enclosed garage.



Oh, sure ... I could go back to him now. Back to Sayid. And he would say "Where have you been, my friend? I haven't seen you these many weeks."



And I could mutter something about being sick, or down in Florida, or on the TARC bus. But he would know. Sayid would know. There would be a slight modulation in my voice, a lowering of the eyes ... and in that instant he would see into my soul and realize that I had exchanged our camaraderie for an automated ticket-punch machine.



I am, of all men, most miserable.